Rozita Made Me Do It

Rozita snares customer

Last weekend I did something I never do. I had a makeover at the Lancome counter.

I have been wearing my makeup the same way since my mother marched me into the Fosi Modeling and Talent Agency in Tucson, Arizona.. I don’t know how old I was—10, 11, 12? But I must have been pretty young because I didn't know what the word “features” meant. On first evaluation, Miss Fosi told my mother I had some nice features to work with. I had to ask my mother what she meant. Miss Fosi  had enough makeup on for both of us. She told me that the most fattening thing I could put in my mouth was a grape. By this she meant wine, and I am still not sure why she was saying this to a 10/11/12 year old.

So I learned the drill: a couple of layers of mascara, eyeliner, foundation, blush and lipstick. These were the basics and still are and I don’t leave home without them. No eye shadow because my mother said it the invention of Satan.

When I was able to climb up from the Ponds and Neutrogena level, I chose the Lancome line, sleek and black and French and glam. But in recent years they betrayed me twice. They discontinued my favorite mascara and foundation. So, acting out like a girl who had been dumped by her boyfriend, I took up with someone else immediately—Christian Dior got both the mascara and foundation business. I wouldn't even look at the Lancome ladies as I passed. I would show them. Dior had a Diorshow Mascara (“a big show mascara inspired by models behind the scenes runway trick.”)

Mascara is very important to me...

Lancome pulled me back in me with a rival to Diorshow, the introduction of a big fat stick of Hypnose Drama mascara.  And in truth I had been monogamous with Lancome for so long that it did seem silly to have to go to TWO counters just for some foundation. 

I like my mascara like my humor, dark and black

Then I met Rozita at the Lancome counter. I was charmed by Rosita and she convinced me I should book a makeover. To my surprise I said yes, giving up part of my precious Saturday because Rozita is someone you can’t say no to.

I got to sit in the high chair as I had seen so many women do over the years, but then again, they probably had not enjoyed the childhood benefit of Miss Flossie. It was a bit of a bait and switch because Rozita turned me over to the make-up pro of the day, Odetta from Lithuania.

Odetta: "Questions?"

When I told Odetta I was in the market for white skinny jeans and didn't have much time left, it being mid-July and all, we talked about the ridiculous convention of not wearing white until Memorial Day and after Labor Day. The Lithuanians are not burdened by this tradition. Odetta took about a half hour to make me over, I learned that I must exfoliate, put on the Energy before the base, use a pencil instead of a liquid liner and use eye cream morning and night. At the end Odetta stood back in a very business-like fashion, looked at me and said: “Questions?”

The stuff I am supposed to use

I had fun at the makeover, and it pumped me up to do more shopping...a couple of skinny jeans and a Christina Maldonado dress that I got to model for all of my new Lancôme BFFs.

Rozita took my phone number and I will undoubtedly respond to her siren’s call, the next promotion, the next deal. She indeed has me hypnosed.

Wearing my new jeggings at the Nats game. Don't want to get the white ones dirty.